Men have sought surcease. They should have been seeking success.
No getting around it. Men should have been asking themselves and each other this question all along. "Why can't I last as long as it takes?" The answer is, "you can." If men had asked each other this question, they would have realized a long time ago that they can succeed.
Instead, we have created a tempest in a tea cup that has gone on for three millennia to distract rather than face that which is clearly an unnecessary failing. We are sentient.
It's always been treated as the greatest secret that everybody knows. It is something that everyone has only kept from themselves. We have turned our existence upside down attempting to avoid the beautiful and inevitable conclusion. Men can love. We are not Human until it is so.
So, read on. Or, not. Keep the secret that is no secret to yourself, just like our dim-witted ancestors have done for the last three millennia. Let the awful, insidious, unnecessary paranoia of the male gender continue to disrupt our loving nature. Or, learn to love.