Or, what is wrong with humanity?
The Great Conversation
There remains a gaping hole in the Great Conversation that prevents humanity from attaining a sane, sentient state. That gaping hole causes the madness, the dystopia.
I hope anyone encountering this site will be patient enough to read as far as Thinking It Through.
The Road Foreword
All men; that is a human, sentient male; can do something they never believed was possible and always desired to do. They desired to do it so desperately that it drove the male gender crazy, derailed our sentient state, and wrecked any hope of humanity becoming what Nature always intended: a loving, emotionally stable and mature, rational, sentient race that respects itself instead of constantly tearing itself down and relying on fictions. "Omigoodness, we're human" rather than "We're only human" is the vast difference.
We are so close to educating the heart that it hurts.
The long answer is a bit more complicated. I'll get into that in later posts.
1. We are completely dependent on coitus (sexual intercourse) for our existence. Without it, we become extinct.
2. For at least three millennia, the sentient race that is human, with its heightened awareness, has known that there is more to coitus. No one, man nor woman, is satisfied with the selfish results of the act of coitus when the ecstasy is not mutual. Oh, yes! Men are relieved but not satisfied if it is not mutual. Only a male animal would be satisfied. A male human is confounded. There is no reason for it to remain so.
The two genders suffer to similar extents but in vastly different ways because of this anomaly to human life.
3. Early humans became convinced we could do no better than an animal at coitus. Mutual coital satisfaction was not even conceivable when we first attained our sentient state. The belief became embedded that there was nothing to be done.
4. The prehumans of long ago had no experience, knowledge, or insights regarding improving an act that had been based in the animal's instinctual reaction for hundreds of millions of years. Premises 1, 2, & 3 confounded them. So they buried the whole issue. Avoiding clarity drives a sentient race mad.
Because of coitus' crucial function, we couldn't stop. Because of our sentient awareness, we could not let it rest.
The simple fact is that, like it or not, coitus must continue or we do not. That, combined with sentient awareness of the imbalanced, frustrating situation without achieving resolution bent our brains like a pretzel.
5. Being sentient and human, we know better.
We know that the human race is not just an animal. We know we should be able to do better than an animal. (We can; I did; see "Explanations")
Unassisted loving coitus (shared ecstasy) needs to become an expectation, just as walking on two legs and talking are. It's that easy, once we rid ourselves of relying on the animal's instincts. It is the next step in attaining our Humanity. Nature, (or, god, if you prefer) did not create us to act like a witless animal.
6. Nature provided everything a human male needs to transform coitus into a consistently loving act. A man can be master of his own body.
7. We have only avoided developing Loving Coitus due to reinforcement of the stupour by our ancestors. We have avoided seeking clarity in all things because of this oversight.
8. We created the word love and the words for noble qualities, because our sentience sensed them. We were left to our own devices to create the circumstances to fulfill them. Nature gave us all that was required and left it to us. Lately, we have become increasingly convinced that love is only gibberish. We have always underestimated love. While we call anything involving sex, "making love", it is only mutual ecstasy that suits the term.
9. Men remain constrained by preconceptions provided by our animal past that lead them to fail.
10. The existing situation renders the male gender, in particular, mad (the female gender gets there by exposure to the madness of the other half of the human race over the last three millennia). Sorry, guys, but you really need to admit this to yourself.
It's not like men enjoy going mad over a lifetime as they repeatedly fail to express their love. They have just been caught in a trap of initial conditions from which they can free themselves.
For a sentient race, there can be so much more to coitus and we know it. Until that happens, love will continue to corrode into lust, perversions, distrust, delusions, obsessions, aberrations, outright lies, madness, mass destruction, and self-destruction.
It is not utopia. It is just no longer dystopia. It is Human, not prehuman.
The biggest irony of all is how easy it is for a man to succeed. That is, any human, thinking male. The male gender is so certain of failure that it has never accepted the concept that they can succeed.
To summarize: we cannot live in a sentient manner while coitus remains in its animal rendition and we cannot exist without coitus. We remain caught at the border of the bizarre world of the animal's stupour, far from the magnificent existence that a sentient, loving landscape can provide.
The phrase "we are only human" says it all. It is the most offensive phrase ever created and, so far, we deserve it. To state it accurately, though, would be to say "we are only prehuman" or, maybe even more appropriate, "woe is me". I look forward to the day that we say, "Omigoodness, we are Human!"
There is one source for all of the dystopia. we experience.
Thinking it through
We have yet to admit what sentience entails.
Our emotional state can mature. Yet, it hasn't. We can think. Yet, we don't.
When it comes to coitus we haven't thought at all; and the topic of sex, in general, is a confused mess of misdirection and entrenched positions.
In the same vein, we have yet to admit what love entails.
A race that lives and dies by coitus will breathe a sigh of relief, once coitus suits our humanity. Those that have blindly defended coitus in the absence of mutual ecstasy will no longer harass those that decide to find some other way to achieve the life-altering, mutually transcendent experience of sharing that remains virtually unknown for coitus. Why should they?
The defense of the act of coitus will no longer be necessary once it becomes an act that provides for sharing the loving engagement and ecstasy. It can finally stand equal with any other form of sex.
One of the worst obstructions is the back and forth regarding other forms of sex that goes nowhere. It is so close to the source of the problem that we have fixed phrases and mindsets rather than thinking it through. Everyone is blindly defending their choice. We just don't want to think it through because of where it leads: coitus.
Anything remotely related to the subject of sex is taboo because it all leads back to the state of coitus not fulfilling the promise of mutual climax that a sentient race, of course, has every reason to expect. There is no blocking the realization, even as hard as we try.
Our thinking has been obstructed, short-circuited, derailed from any thoughts that range anywhere near the subject of coitus.
Of course, the mania spreads from coitus into every other aspect of our existence. How could it not?
No one reads between the lines of those conversations, shouting matches, and paralyzed positions regarding sex. The one subject that is most important is always off the table for discussion: coitus. Everyone does their best to purge from their minds the seemingly hopeless knot that coitus represents. It is a gaping hole in our sentient perspective. It obstructs clarity.
Of late, we have broken through and begun to discuss all of the other forms of sex, to our constant dismay, but coitus never enters the conversation.
Once Loving Coitus becomes an available choice for everyone, then it no longer matters what choice any two people make. The choice is not a free choice until Loving Coitus exists as an alternative for anyone.
We have everything it takes to succeed, from the realization that coitus has so much more to offer, to the simple muscle control and mastery required to make coitus a successful act of love by overcoming the animal's instincts. We can think.
Men have been trained to fail for millennia and the male animal for a billion years before that. Whether we want to admit it or not, we are not built to accept failure. Men have tried everything within the restrictions inherent within the bounds of the animal's instinct. The instincts can be easily circumvented by a sentient mind.
Take a close look at the instincts that drive the quick conclusion and the answer becomes glaringly apparent. I have written alot about all of this throughout the books (see the post Explanations, also).
For an animal, it is enough that coitus produces babies. It is not enough for a race whose awareness tells them there's so much more to the act, beginning with mutual ecstasy and ending with a loving intimate relationship that can last and flourish. It creates an advanced form of caring.
We have to learn to walk on two legs and talk. We learn to ride a bike and a million other things. Coitus is no different and we are not Human until we learn that we can succeed and do so.
We do our best to think of the most incredible act of human existence as something to be purged from our brain. We curse sex because its most natural form, coitus, is found wanting. We do not celebrate what should be a transcendent experience for both because we have yet to share that experience consistently. We have taken such a negative attitude that we don't even consider success.
"The act by which humanity lives and dies is not up to snuff for a sentient race and there's nothing to be done about it" is the conclusion that broke the back of our Humanity. The most incredible, remarkable, amazing, celebratory, ecstatic act of existence for a sentient couple and we swept it under the rug. Religions curse it. We remain filled with shame and guilt regarding coitus.
The one act that breeds life does not fulfill the loving potential that any sentient being knows is available once we get it right.
We cannot manufacture or fabricate our way out of the predicament. No pill is a substitute. The pill is just another form of defeat for the Human race.
It is nothing more than sentient to make unassisted Loving Coitus work as a Human expects. It can.
It is just such a weird situation. Men are scared down to their roots to confront the problem. Men have always feared the confirmation that it is hopeless, so they just don't want to talk about it. Everything in our history tells men that it is too big of a challenge because it was settled before we could bring to bear the full facilities of a sentient race. The animal's take on coitus (and everything else) has dominated our narrative since the beginning.
After tearing down the walls of obstruction, it is pretty easy to begin to see the way through. It will grow even easier, once men become convinced the male gender can succeed at making coitus human and loving. The biggest barrier is the fear to try.
All roads that lead to unrestrained sentient awareness and a loving state become open once we realize that the most natural act of creation can also become the most important expression of love between a couple and is essential to fulfilling the concept of love for a sentient race.
We know what's missing but have never convinced ourselves that we can be masters of our own bodies. Love is real. Love exists in a frail, fragile, shadowy form, right now. That has to change.
I was reading an aphorism the other day that says it well. When will the power of love overcome the love of power? When we finally enable men's self-respect to remain true throughout a lifetime. It fulfills the potential for the love and noble qualities that come with fulfillment of our sentient state. Then we will truly become Human.
There are two desires for a human when it comes to coitus. Ecstasy for oneself and one's partner. Animals haven't the wit to comprehend what is missing nor the wit to do anything about it. We do.
Moving forward
Men need to learn to make the act of coitus an act of love. The first step is to last long enough to make it more than a selfish act. They need to make love possible. The rest will come naturally for a sentient being.
Men have sought surcease. They should have been seeking success.
No getting around it. Men should have been asking themselves and each other this question all along. "Why can't I last as long as it takes?" The answer is, "you can." If men had asked each other this question, they would have realized a long time ago that they can succeed.
Instead, we have created a tempest in a tea cup that has gone on for three millennia to distract from rather than face that which is clearly an unnecessary failing for a sentient race.
It's always been treated as the greatest secret that everybody knows. It is something that everyone has only kept from themselves. We have turned our existence upside down attempting to avoid the beautiful and inevitable conclusion.
So, read on. Or, not. Keep the secret that is no secret to yourself, just like our dim-witted ancestors have done for the last three millennia.
As the human race began to gain the heightened awareness of a sentient state, the male gender had to confront the fact that it wasn't very good at coitus. Each individual male had no idea how good any other male was at coitus because they did not want to reveal their own ineptness. They didn't want to talk about it. This caused a gaping hole in our awareness. It also lodged a doubt in men's minds regarding themselves and their gender.
The male gender increasingly began to display a paranoid approach to life. Were other men better at Loving Coitus? Males have always fought to cover up their ineptness at sex, never realizing it is the common case. That is a disaster.
Sentience seeks clarity. The male gender has been intent on hiding from clarity on this single subject.
It has been a rock around the neck of humanity It can and must change.
The desire to prove themselves has produced many bizarre aberrations in the male gender in the absence of the only desire that must be fulfilled for the male gender. The aberrations, on their own, never fulfill. They become all-consuming when unleashed.
This pose adopted has driven the male gender mad (in both senses of the word).
Can you begin to recognize all of the destructive antics of the stunted, paranoid male? Can you separate them from the gallant efforts of many men to act like they are wholly human?
I hope you can see the flaw it has caused in our existence. It is more than dangerous. It is a mortal wound to our sentient state.
The Great Conversation Recap
There remains a gaping hole in the Great Conversation that prevents humanity from attaining a sane, sentient state. It causes the madness, the dystopia. It can be gone in the virtual blink of the eye.
The Great Conversation, Part II
When we first emerged into our sentient state of heightened awareness, while much of existence confounded us, there was one particular aspect, one legacy of the animal, that humanity could not confront. It was too much for our feeble-minded ancestors. We are no longer feeble-minded.
For three millennia, as we have learned to comprehend so much about existence, this aspect of the stupoured state of the animal has held us in thrall. We have yet to allow a close inspection of ourselves. We shunted the most important aspect of sentient emergence into the void.
Clarity is the sentient call, the sentient goal. This aspect befuddled it all.
The Great Conversation, definition
My definition of The Great Conversation differs from those trying to sell books, which is all about the great thinkers (see Aphorisms, for instance). The Great Conversation, to me, extends much further than that.
Maybe, The Great Narrative would be a better term. It is the widely accepted reality of the human race. That which is missing in order for us to attain our Humanity and sanity must be understood.
A few such concepts that are learned are walking on two legs, talking, and writing. They are distinguishable because they are learned concepts. Unless someone is disabled, it is expected that they can be learned by anyone that is not disabled.
There is one more such learning that must become commonly accepted by the bulk of humanity. Then, we will begin to become Human rather than a demented animal.
The current Great Narrative
Everyone extrapolates the horrors of our current existence into the future. That is how we got here. Just look at any speculative fiction (or headlines) regarding humanity.
Rather than continue that trend, I looked for our potential, found promise, and uncovered that which prevents humanity from becoming whole.
If you think about it, we have never gotten past the animal's take on existence. It is laced through every conversation regarding the human race. We continue to look in the rear view mirror and extrapolate it into the future. "Woe is me," seems to succinctly describe the bones of the current Great Narrative.
It is time we change the Narrative. Make it wholly Human and sentient.
Let's see if I can put Loving Coitus into the simplest terms.
Men need to learn to make the act of coitus an act of love. The first step is to last long enough to make it possible. The rest will come naturally for a sentient being.
The simplest and most obvious observation is that it shouldn't be so difficult. It isn't. It is only complicated to understand. That and the inability to admit there was a problem has held us in thrall to the animal for millennia.
There is only one reason the act of love is not. Pressure on the glands in the crotch of the male makes certain it is all over soonest. The pressure is applied by the muscles in the crotch and certain positions of the musculoskeletal structure.
It is all about mastering muscles. That is something a Human can do and an animal cannot. That's it. It is simpler muscle control than talking and less coordination than riding a bike. The muscles can be easily trained not to respond, except on command. Once men get the hang of it, it's as easy as walking on two legs.
Got it?
There is far more in Explanations, near the end of the posts.
Conscious evolution
As opposed to genetic evolution, conscious adaptation to circumstances is how a sentient race evolves itself as it seeks clarity. It makes of evolution something that is no longer willy-nilly. We aren't there yet.
Humanity will accelerate the race's evolution into rational directions, once completely liberated by its sentient cognitive function, which is the ability to comprehend so much more than an animal and seek clarity. It's no longer about intelligence. It's about clarity. It is not about educating the mind. It is about educating the heart.
Conscious evolution is all about adaptation to realizations that our sentient, conscious awareness makes apparent. Conscious evolution will supplant witless revolution for the Human race.
The subconscious is where prehumanity puts realizations that it has not been willing or able to process, just like an animal. That substitutes dismay for clarity.
One subject is so momentous that we attempted to prevent any trace of it remaining. That is, of course, impossible for a sentient race whose awareness seeks answers and demands clarity. Especially when what is missing is so glaringly obvious and remediable.
Because it is so momentous, clarity suffered a debilitating blow. As we age, we learn to obscure it entirely from sight. That is what we attempt to teach our children. That is what children have and always will rebel against, until the whole truth is revealed.
We will be truly sentient when we can gather our thoughts as a species and adapt to that which our sentience has made crystal clear.
This is a story about what liberates both the mind and the heart of humanity. We can think and live consciously, rationally, amidst a mature emotional backdrop of stability and balance by no longer pandering to the animal's witless approach to life.
Aphorisms
(italics are mine)
"Education of the mind without education of the heart is no education at all."
-Aristotle; We have yet to educate the heart
“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”
- Eleanor Roosevelt
"The smell of a world that is burned"
- Jimi Hendrix
"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace"
-Either Jimi Hendrdix or Mahatma Gandhi
I would add "Only" at the beginning of the sentence.
"When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?"
- Eleanor Roosevelt
“Power at its most vicious is a riposte to powerlessness.”
- Simone de Beauvoir
"Sure he (Fred Astaire) was great, but don't forget that Ginger Rogers did everything he did, ...backwards and in high heels.”
- Bob Thaves, “Frank and Ernest” comic strip
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
"And nothing natural is evil"
-Marcus Aurelius
"The unexamined life is not worth living"
"Let he that would move the world first move himself"
"From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate"
- Socrates
"History is a pack of lies about events that never happened told by people who weren't there."
- George Santayana
"The reason why the world lacks unity, and lies broken and in heaps, is, because man is disunited with himself."
"What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"And that's the thing
Do you recognize the bell of truth
When you hear it ring"
-Leon Russell
"For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction."
-Lord Byron
"I've got some words to say about the way we live today.
Why can't we learn to love each other.
It's time to learn a new face for the whole world wide human race."
-Leon Russell
"We are what we repeatedly do. Therefore, excellence is not an act, but a habit."
-Aristotle
"A little learning is a dangerous thing
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian Spring"
-Alexander Pope
“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
― Albert Einstein
“It is never too late to be what you might have been.”
― George Eliot
“We accept the love we think we deserve.”
― Stephen Chbosky
"I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken"
"I try my best to be just like I am
But everybody wants you to be just like them
They say, sing while you're saved and I just get bored"
-Bob Dylan
"One who asks a question feels like a fool for a moment. One who refuses to ask a question feels like a fool for a lifetime." Or, a sentient race remains a fool for millennia.
-Japanese proverb
Humanity remains a dilettante at sentience, a poser. We're on the threshold of something more, something Human.
The human race is doing a fine job of acting like an animal with too much brains and too little sense and calls itself human. When will the human race be Human with love in its heart and sense in its head?
It's not about the individual being human. It is about the human race being human.
One indication that we have attained our Humanity will be when no one desires to lead or be led.
It's about clarity, not intelligence. Intelligence desperately seeking to obscure clarity drives us mad.
Prehumanity is made of pragmatists and dreamers. Both are lying to themselves. Humanity will be made of pragmatic dreamers seeking clarity.