Betrayal

 Betrayal

I have tried to pin down that feeling that one gets when they first confront the seemingly bizarre reason that humanity is such a mess.

In retrospect, I realize I had the same feeling when I first realized what was wrong with humanity.  Maybe the biggest difference is that I had already been looking for what is wrong with humanity.  Even so, it still dogged my steps for the last fifteen years.  That should have been a clue for me long ago.  Mostly, it just enraged me because I realized I had been duped for a lifetime and humanity had duped itself for three millennia.  But, still, it lurked and irked.

I've often called the effect dumbstruck or dumbfounded which, I think, is true enough.  But, it's more than that.

It is something that dragged on my thoughts for most of the last fifteen years, making the whole process difficult.  I've mentioned it in a few posts of late as a feeling of betrayal of my gender.  I now realize it goes even deeper than that.

There's a feeling of betrayal in believing there could possibly be anything wrong with coitus.  It's a stupid thought.  It is the thought of an animal.  Sentience changed everything, including the desired outcome of the act of coitus.

All of the creepy feelings of shame, guilt, and the inability to express oneself on the subject of coitus comes out in so many indirect ways.  

Now, I realize all of those indirect implications are the sentient properties of the human race attempting to express its dismay within the backdrop of the stupour that is holding it back.  We have only protested the awful state of coitus, if at all, with our feet, never daring to open our mouths to mention it. 

It sums up to a mysterious, insidious feeling of betrayal.  A sentient race owes no allegiance to the animal's take on anything.

        We are betraying our sentient awareness and clarity by never opening up about what we know to be true.  We are lying to ourselves.  The lies invade every aspect of our lives.

We can't even talk about coitus but can't cease talking about sex.  It is almost like a comic routine in which we run through all of these antics while ignoring the source of dismay that is blaring in the background.  It's just not funny at all.  

Coitus has never been a topic of serious conversation because it ruffles feathers.  That is no reason to avoid the conversation.  It ruffles feathers whether it is discussed or not.  It is like attempting to soothe a time bomb.

    How do we confront that which is critical to our existence?  By embracing the sentient, thinking, sensitive creature that Nature has always envisioned.

Yes, coitus makes babies, but that is not enough for a sentient, highly aware, highly evolved race of beings.  We will remain mad until we confront the issue and resolve it decisively.  Whether we like it or not, we are aware of the problem with coitus.  There is no reason that all men cannot naturally overcome the dumb animal's failings.

        We have remained inhibited, constrained for all of our sentient existence, never attaining a clear-eyed sentient existence because of it.

The realization that coitus had something missing (for a sentient race) was such a surprise to a race that was still nothing more than witless animals when they first gained their advanced state of sentience that they could not face it.  We still haven't faced reality because the stupour is reinforced every time we attempt to confront the awful state of sentience that rutting coitus causes.

Because coitus is so important to an advanced state of sentience, we can never leave it alone.  Sentient awareness continues to push back on the stupour.  The misguided and embedded feelings of shame, guilt, and betrayal of the animal continue to hold its own.  

    Until I came along.  I still wonder if the human race will succeed at penetrating the stupour at this point it time?  Or, will we piddle ourselves to death?  Will we rely on magic rather than face the truth?

Behind that feeling of betrayal is the stupoured thinking of an animal that, without coitus, we are done.  

While that is true, the only way it comes to that is if we continue to hide from the truth.  Confronting the truth will free us.  A sentient race requires more and it has the tools to attain it (clearly, I am not talking about a pill but our Humanity).  

It is interesting to me that those that have already betrayed the animal's edict that "sex is only about making babies" are just as adamant about not accepting the truth.  I have explained why that is the case elsewhere, like Thinking It Through.

Pavlov's Dog has been trained to not think at all on the subject of coitus.  The animal has remained convinced that there is nothing to be done, and it fights tooth and nail to hide from the sentient realization that coitus must become more.  We put every obstruction imaginable between Humanity and the lack that we all sense.  Distractions, violence, and lies are the usual witless methods to avoid the subject.  Shout it down, keep prehumans ravening.  Keep them thinking witlessly.   Never, ever allow them to take the time to unravel the mess that our predecessors left for us.  What a plan.