"Man destroyed, woman destroyed"

The title to this poem is a modification of the title of a book by Simone de Beauvoir, Woman Destroyed.

Man becomes hobbled with waning of truth
As lifetime progresses from bounds of his youth
Deceit is embedded so deep below skin
As misleading message sinks deeply within
Man could be coruscant, shining so bright
Except for embarrassment hid in the night
The man is befuddled as lie fades from view
Deceit in the heart as the specters renew
Now, comes a lady, the heart of desire
Lighting the essence, release spinal fire
Deceit in the loving encompasses life
Deep in the heart, lust plunges the knife
The fire is not lit, but the woman endures
'Til the bane of the man escalates and ensures
That the man is unhinged and unreason pours out
Then, only then, is the woman in rout

Unreason comes forth in so many forms

But all, in their essence, resembling storms

Seeking the love, while the heart does pursue

But, falling away, as they're falling for you

Or, ranting distractions to hide from the view

The failure men know, as the loving comes due

w

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I thought I would try a few poems to convey these very foreign ideas.  Maybe that will work for some people. 

Simone de Beauvoir was a genius.  She clearly knew woman was not at fault for humanity's predicament.  Her work, Woman Destroyed, led to this poem.  

What she, understandably, missed was that, perplexingly, the man is destroyed first, causing all of the havoc.  He doesn't seem destroyed because it was bred into him to act like everything was alright.  The man learns early to put on an act displaying himself as confident and sure, even though, deep in his heart, he knows he is destroyed.  There lies all of our confusion.

From reading many of her works, it becomes clear that she never admitted to herself that men have fuct up our situation thoroughly since day one.  She started the trend that all that was needed was for women to break free.  I wish it were so simple.  She always focused on the desperate struggle of the women's freedom, never suspecting that, until the man is freed from his bane, no one can be free.  It's understandable.  It was a man's issue to discover the issue that men have endured.  

If you don't think humanity's affairs are a mess (the general overall dysfunction and destruction), then you have a much higher tolerance for stupidity, viciousness, and unreason than me.

This makes me want to rewrite The Garden Of Eden and lay fault where it really belongs.  It's really a minor tweak.  Just portray a man writing the whole damn fictional diatribe against women pretty much clears things up.

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The depth of these poems escaped me until now, almost a decade after I wrote them. The poems contained far more meaning than I ever realized.  The poems are like a condensed version, a shorthand, of the nine books I wrote.

I stopped writing poetry on the subject years ago for a couple of reasons.  It was necessary, as I became convinced that the general public would never read the poetry regarding the bane of mankind, much less understand it.  (like I said, it took me about a decade to figure the complexity of this poem out for myself, a lot of the meaning is somewhat hidden) (funny thing.  I have never touched this poem since I wrote it).  So, I began writing the books.  They are thorough, if somewhat laborious.  What can I say?  Three thousand years we have been held in thrall by the animal.  So, yeah, it's complicated.  I am now uncertain whether either, poetry or prose, will ever get through.  There was another reason I moved away from this subject in poetry.  I found beauty, angst, and despair where I least expected it and it just about killed me.  I was also overwhelmed and wrote about six hundred poems (I think it's about eight hundred now, maybe a thousand) about the most amazing woman I had ever encountered (along with  the eight (twelve) books of prose on our sentience and lack thereof).  (She is incredibly unique.  New under the sun, though She will never admit it - She even wrote something that describes the situation perfectly from a woman's point of view!  Of course, in shorthand.  It actually highlights an interesting point: the situation has changed somewhat since the days of Simone. in many ways, due to Simone)   Ummm, let me just clarify.  As Desiderata so perfectly explains, every step along the way, as full of anguish and anger as it has been, has been necessary.  I am just so tired of playing the part of Pangloss.  So, I guess there is still a remnant of Janus in me.  I know Desiderata is accurate to a great extent.  That doesn't make it easy to take.  The question is when do we achieve the tipping point?

It probably sounds crazy but rhoetry works to secure my intuitive thoughts.  To nail them to the wall, so to speak.  They explain everything so well for me.  Just not for anyone else.  I cannot be the least bit ambiguous to convince anyone else, which is why I turned to prose (to my lasting regret, it works. it was necessary, it's just that I'd rather be writing poetry and I'd rather be writing about my favorite subject).  

It is also why I rewrite like mad (and, also, one reason I am so annoyed by the publishing process).  Unlike anything written before, precision and accuracy of what I convey is crucial.  At least, until humanity catches on in a big way.  It is not enough to just slap interesting words down on paper.  It is important, since it is so far beyond the known animal reality, that I portray the situation as accurately as possible.

I think I've shown well enough elsewhere just how difficult that is to do when faced with the mad reality of a sentient creature caught in the throes of an animal's perspective.  I have had to connect so many disparate dots as to boggle the mind of just about anyone else.  I've explained that well enough elsewhere, also.

"Intuitive" thoughts, in essence, are collecting a number of observations of our bizarre, unfulfilled existence and piecing them together into partial answers to what I knew in my heart was true (kinda the ultimate intuitive thought): humanity can be whole and put away the animal forever.  That intuitive thought was buried so incredibly deep I couldn't initially even put it into words.

With poetry, my conscious mind gets caught up in the technical details of creating the rhyme and the rhythm.  That leaves the rest of my mind to roam free through the subconscious to connect observations regarding human life collected over a very long lifetime (in other words, I didn't kill myself off at 30.  just saying). Most of my life was spent observing, not interacting; the prehuman condition does not agree with me at all.  All I could do was observe the insane antics of an insane prehuman race and, then, analyze like crazy in every way possible).

Let's see if I can convey in prose what this particular poem hints at.  I was inspired for this poem by Simone de Beauvoir and, in particular her book, Woman Destroyed.  It was read soon after my intuitive realization that men are broken and there is no need for it to remain so.  I read a lot of Simone.  Understandable, since she is of the gender that is not the source of our insanity.  The best a woman can do is attempt to break free from the awful grip.  Men are the ones that need to gain their humanity.

I am still not sure if she got that men have always been playing a shell game on humanity.  "Look over there, not over here!"  Again, understandable.  How could she possibly understand how failing to love breaks a person?  A woman never fails to love (read the books.  that is not as you may think) until the ability is beaten out of her, either figuratively, mentally, or physically.   I'm not even sure a woman can understand the concept.  I guess not surprisingly, that is encouraging for a future in which both men and women know how to love.

Her husband was bad news.   Besides being an awful husband, Sartre also pisses me off because existentialism is a perfect example of the shell game (see poem "Escapism").  The shell game of the male gender:  "Look over there, not over here!" I guess another quote to describe it might be, "Look at this shiny new toy!"  It is always a game of distraction.  He's worse than any scifi author because the scifi author at least admits that it is all fiction.

Basically, the male gender has always been so desperate to hide its failing, that they have been scamming ever since they realized their failure and failed to overcome it.  Let me emphasize, it is easily overcome - for a human.  Instead, we got "look over there!" for more than three millennia.  And, it has just been continually getting worse.  Look around.  We are accelerating our pace to embrace the animal as we get closer to throwing away any shred of our humanity.  If I wasn't so disgusted with spending fifteen years dissecting and explaining the animal, I could go to great lengths to show that we are becoming more and more adapted to the disgusting animal viewpoint as we throw away every remnant of our humanity.

The male gender had to scam in order to attempt to hide its failing.  That has been the biggest disaster of our existence.  If only we had owned up to the awful failure that does not need to remain.  The scam artist became a trait of the gender.  That can change in a virtual heartbeat.  

So, to get to the point, man is destroyed first.  He was destroyed long ago.  He can never attain his humanity until he puts away the scam artist.  He has passed it down to every single male descendent in every generation in one form or another.  For no good reason!!!!

If you have not read my books you may have difficulty following this, so let me just emphasize that there is no reason for the failure to continue.  Men have endured it all along because animal life had endured it for a billion years before that.  Animals can't do a damn thing about it but humans can.  All we need do is wake up and invoke our sentience.  No pills, acrobatics, alternatives, or appurtenances required.  We are not just animals.

You have no idea how badly it pisses me off that it had to come down to me to grasp this fact and, more importantly, that it took a lifetime to do so.  If men had not been scamming all along, and making stupid prophetic utterances in their early thirties (always trying to bask in the damned spotlight), they would have figured it all out long ago.